There are a few lessons I have learned being a single woman for the last year or so.
It has been awhile since my last vent, so…
Today would have been my 10th anniversary. So, I of course I weighed the pros and cons of my last year “alone”. I am one of the lucky ones…my divorce was quiet and I was able to remain amicable with the ex. Maybe thats why today was kind of heavy for me. There were no evil litigious thoughts aimed toward him to “get me through”. Instead, there were happy memories and just a general heart search. He was and still is a good man…we simply fell apart and did the wise thing of parting before we absolutely hated one another. And there are details that I will never reveal that brought us to that decision. We still respect one another and he will always have a place in my life.
What I have learned in the last year is this:
Point 1. I am stronger than I thought I could ever be on my own.
Point 2. Men will come out of the woodwork when they learn you are newly “available”
Point 3. I love being single!
Thoughts on point 1:
I was taken care of during my marriage. It’s a wonderful thing, but it can be daunting once you are a single woman. I had to learn to do so much on my own because the Mr. always took care of it. I have learned I am capable of making decisions and getting things done. (though I do miss someone to carry my groceries into the house ;))
Thoughts on point 2:
Everyone thinks that it is “so sad” when someone “loses” a mate and that that void must be filled. NOT TRUE. I honestly am not looking for a set up. And available men need not feel the pressure to swoop in.
I prefer that things happen organically…nothing forced. Boy meets girl type of stuff. (I am a romantic after all)
Thoughts on point 3:
Being a social introvert, I am loving the vast amounts of alone time singleness provides. I like having to only answer to myself. I like making decisions and not having to worry if it affects another. I do what I want. 😉
All that being said…I am a woman who loves love. I will eventually get over the need to be independently single and want to have someone to go through this life with.
I have never been one to trust easily, so he will have to be one heck of a guy. I am very particular in where I lay that trust, and, I am sorry, but men are so hard to read these days.
I want a love that is not ordinary. I want something I have to work for. I want someone who will appreciate the difference that I bring to the table. I am not a simple/basic woman.
That is the truth.
I am a hopeless romantic…but the romantic side of me is on hold, so…to be continued.